Government Subsidized “Karen” program Offers Free Name Changes to Avoid Public Distain
Nevada Brothels Prepare to Offer Social Distanced Services Upon Reopening
With the phased reopening of businesses in the state of Nevada underway, the Nevada sex industry is prepping its own guidelines for reopening its members’ doors.
Seriously, Being a Man Fucking Blows Too!
Did you know it totally fucking sucks to be a man? It’s true. Girls think having a dick is all sunshine & rainbows but that’s not the case at all!
Crust Punk May Hold Key To Coronavirus Cure
Doctors confirm that a local homeless crust punk from New York City may hold the key to a cure for Coronavirus.
Amid Coronavirus Pandemic, New York Hospitals Reach out to Volunteers for Homemade Body Bags
Amid cries for help from overwhelmed doctors, nurses, and coroners, hospitals have begun reaching out to the public to supply homemade body bags.
Creeper’s Dick Pics Continue to go Unappreciated
Local Pervert Disappointed with Free PornHub Premium Membership
Boise, Idaho - Late Thursday afternoon, a local pervert took to Twitter to express his disappointment in his free PornHub Premium Membership. Matthew Horton, a janitor at a local Chuck E. Cheese, told his 8 followers that his experience with the online pornography...
Local Child Dies After Consuming Expired Car Seat
Recent reports indicate that the failure to replace a child’s expired car seat has resulted in the death of a toddler who consumed a portion of the outdated vehicular safety device.
Kennedy Family Agrees to Sterilize all Remaining Members
After yet another tragedy, the remaining members of the Kennedy family announced they’d be sterilizing themselves in order to put an end to their cursed bloodline.
Latest Articles
Trump Pardons Joe Exotic in Desperate Bid for “the Gay Vote”
In a desperate bid to secure “the gay vote” in the 2020 presidential election, Donald Trump announced he would pardon Tiger King Joe Exotic.
“The Fuckening” – Fuck Bots of the Future, Today!
Once AI is implemented we’re gonna have a national security issue on our hands & wangs. Sit tight humanity. The fuck bots are cumming to a store near you.
Donald Trump – “My Pillow” May Cure Coronavirus
According to a recent announcement by President Donald Trump, buying your very own “My Pillow” may help cure coronavirus.
Family Dog Caught In Possession of Sample Ballot
According to a conservative woman, their family dog was caught with a sample ballot and was planning to vote for Joe Biden.
Vulture Lands on Biden’s Podium During Televised Campaign Speech
During a recent televised public address, a menacing vulture landed on Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden’s podium.
National Strippers’ Union to Phase out Police Uniforms
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